Today should have been my due date. We should be in the hospital, waiting for our little one to arrive. Instead, I woke up, took a shower and headed to work. My world became so different back in September.
When the doctor told me I miscarriages again, I was depressed. I could hardly talk to anyone without tears in my eyes and a heavy heart. I was struggling with the what-ifs. Over some time, it got easier to accept the harsh reality and slowly move on. But in my heart, I knew that March 21st would be my toughest day yet.
If you had told me in September, that I would be okay and able to make it through this day, I would have laughed. Strangely enough, I have made it through today with every little meltdowns. It hasn’t been an easy feat but I’m surviving.
Instead of bringing a new life into this world today, I’m bringing home the bacon. Instead of cuddling with a baby, I’m cuddling with my puppy. Instead of becoming a family of three, I’m spending the evening with my husband.
Somehow, I’m surviving today. Just like I will every day.
All my love,